Bucky Barnes sees a fucking raccoon firing a machine gun while cackling like a maniac and instead of losing his shit he just shrugs, picks it up and spins it around Mary Poppins style
Listen Bucky “Type B 4 Life” “Too Chill Even Without Cryo” Barnes has been rolling with unreasonable shit his entire fucking life.
– Pre-serum Steve. I feel I don’t need to elaborate on this too much
– Steve rolling on up to the POW camp like the lovechild of Adonis and Hercules and all Bucky has to say about it is if it hurt or if it‘s permanent
– “I’m drinking alone and look like the human equivalent of a room that got “cleaned” by a kid shoving all their stuff under the bed; I clearly just suffered a massive physical and psychological trauma; my entire understanding of what was physically possible, as well as my place in the world and in the life of my Most Important Person, has just been flipped upside down, bent in half, and beaten to death with a crowbar. Naturally I am going to jump right back into a war zone with a crack squad led by a Greek God who I once watched throw up in a Coney Island trash can.”
– “oh this guy who watched me assassinate the director of SHIELD just threw his weapon at me, but I’m not ordered to kill him so I’ll just throw it back and fuck off while he’s distracted.”
– “I completely accept and won’t argue against being mindwiped, even though I am clearly terrified of it, simply for asking questions my handler doesn’t like.”
(ok this is getting depressing)
– just got arrested, triggered into going on a rampage, crashed a helicopter, and woke up in an abandoned…someplace with your arm in a vice? The only thing to do is immediately suit up and rush off to an airport in Germany so you can take a plane to Siberia to stop someone’s evil plan alongside people you mostly don’t know and Steve “so what are we” Rogers
Wide Spread Interests 