Pointless LOTR headcanon of the day: Frodo & Merry both take after their mothers, meaning Frodo looks more like a Brandybuck than a Baggins and Merry looks more like a Took. This is a constant source of petty contention.
(Pippin meanwhile absolutely takes after his father & is the most Tookish looking)
Merry: call me a Took one more time
Gandalf: if it looks like a Took and acts like a Took it’s a Took
Merry: I will END you
Gandalf is the only nonhobbit in the fellowship who understands the minutiae of Took Vs Brandybuck Vs Baggins rivalry & he delights in it, everyone else baffled
Frodo: look it’s perfectly simple. The Brandybucks don’t like the Tooks because they play golf and think they’re better than everyone because they occasionally go on adventures. The Tooks don’t like the Brandybucks because they live on the wrong side of the river and like boats. And nobody likes the Bagginses because they’re annoying.
Aragorn: are you… Including yourself in that
Frodo: I said what I said.
Frodo: now the Bagginses don’t like the Brandybucks OR the Tooks because they’re highly disrepectable but also richer than they are. And as far as a lot of the Bagginses are concerned I’m a Brandybuck because I grew up in Buckland and I have the Brandybuck Profile
Merry: which just means he’s not pug-ugly
Frodo: quite.
Aragorn: this is all ridiculous. Keep going.
Gandalf: Hm now I wouldn’t say UGLY but… every Baggins I’ve ever met has been perfectly Round or perfectly Square… There is no middle ground.
Gimli, baffled: Frodo isn’t round OR square
Merry: that’s because he has the Brandybuck profile
Gimli: so… Is he a Brandybuck…
Merry: ABSOLUTE not
Frodo: slander!! I’m a Baggins how dare you
Pippin: was your father a Round Baggins or a Square Baggins
Frodo: my father… Was the ROUNDEST Baggins who ever lived… A perfect Sphere of hobbit…
we were discussing the possibility of Pope Francis being a reptilian alien and then I recalled something important
But, like, imagine Vatican officials reading through tumblr during the beatification process. Imagine someone’s tumblr becoming official Church documents. Like in and amongst the randomness, someone has spiritual revelations that future theolgeons will study. How weird would that be?
Does this mean that my memes will be relics and spiritual tools?
today I went out to get some research started with two other people i’m working with and we ended up on this fairly treacherous cliff/slope spot trying to navigate to some tricky coordinates and one of my group members slipped on the slope and started sliding and he reached out and grabbed for a sapling and the ground was so loose it just started going down with him and I was too far away to immediately help him but I wanted to alert my other group member to his peril but I fuckin’ panicked and I just said “THERE he GOES”
if you ever feel you didn’t respond correctly to a situation, ask yourself if you watched someone all but totally fall off a cliff and said “there he goes”
OBVIOUSLY he’s okay or I wouldn’t have posted about it. He got another, sturdier tree.
one time i was camping with my gf in a park that had hella bears and it was dark and we were sitting around the campfire and i had the sudden inkling to turn around and there was a bear not five feet behind me and my first instinct was to say “HEY. YOURE not supposed to be here!” and i feel like that has very similar energy
Wide Spread Interests 